Your Coach For Life > Kate’s Blog > Self-doubt > Confusion on the rock – meet hate with love

Confusion on the rock – meet hate with love

They say there is no love without hate and no hate without love. I think this is very true. I remember when I was young, I used to hate this boy in my class but then the more I thought about him and how much I hated him, I have learnt to love him and he become my boyfriend. 

On the other hand, there is my ex-husband, who I used to love so much that it hurt; I thought that he was the love of my life. Now, I see it from a different angle since my family has been through so much, I feel that I don’t even know this person anymore. Funny the way our feelings play up on us.

Why can one hurt another when they know that you love them? How can they put you in a position so that you are scared all the time? How can you explain it to your children that everything is going to be alright? Why do you protect this person from the world knowing what he/she is like and what they have done?

And why did you love them in the first place? How can we not see at the beginning what this person is like and how they react for certain events? Do we have a warning sign for the change or trigger for such behaviour? This is what I call confusion on the rock.  Not rocket science but pure honesty.
I’m not going to answer to all these questions at this moment in time, just putting them out there into the void. However, we will cover them at a later stage, step by step.

Forgive me for being so honest, but this is one of the reasons why we are here; to help others to overcome difficult patches in their life.
Hate is a strong word but you may have felt similar emotions before.

These feelings – love and hate – get the whole situation more confusing all together. How can you act reasonably and with reality if you are so confused? Now the answer on this is simple: You don’t need to make the decision immediately; just take your time.

Clear your mind, find space to be able to think rationally. This is important when you making life transforming decisions. Focus your attention on what’s good for you and for your children – if you have any – and not on the hate. I will later show you ways in which you can find your space.

So let’s get into some action and start sorting out our life. I’m going to help you with this and we are going to succeed.

Tip: On a scale of 1-10 where do you put your life goals? List a few and put a number next to each of them. For example, fitness, relationship, friends, socialising, fun, career, health, wealth etc.
Then in the next column put a number where you want it to be in your ideal world.

Now, we are going to have to figure out how you going to get there… In the next few months we will cover various ways to move forward towards our goals, so keep following my blogs.

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